Vote for ME!!

For what? I don't know. Anything you can think of, I suppose. I'm not running for anything. I haven't been nominated for anything. I don't think that anyone is about run an election or contest that would include me, or even anything for which I would be an appropriate candidate. The only office I can recall ever winning was as a double write-in (both the title of the office and myself as an unknowing candidate) was sophomore class dog catcher at the undergraduate school which I finally escaped. This would seem to be as accurate an example of sophomoric behavior as any.

To digress for a moment; this act was perpetrated by the the same "friends" who left a cat in a drawer of my desk when I went home for a weekend and who paid my demand for 30 pieces of silver to accept the strangest student in the class as a roommate so no one else would have to. It is also closely tied to my dislike of the school itself, which during the graduation ceremony gave me a diploma cover which contained, rather than a diploma, a note stating that I owed the business office $32.00. For 41 years now, I have diligently kept that college up to date with my current address in the hope that I will eventually cost them more in printing fees and postage than I spent on my alleged-ucation there.

Back to voting for me, though. I have "won" a number of offices, titles, contests, and the like, but I don't recall ever having done so by a process that required campaigning or voting. If I have forgotten one, I maintain that I did not run for it intentionally. I was pushed.

I have now come to a point in my life that I want to win something. I want the warm, fuzzy feeling of knowing that my constituency really wants me to have this. So I now ask, nay beg, for your vote. The only part I am unclear on is what I wish to be running for. I shall, therefore, leave it to an enlightened electorate to decide exactly what it is for which I might best be suited (or do the least damage,) vote for me for that position, and then tell me in a comment what I was running for and if I won. I thank you in advance for your kind consideration and greatly appreciate your confidence in me.

Peace, Doc

Copyright © 2009, Thomas A. Blood, Ph.D.

"Anything important is never left to the vote of the people. We only get to vote on some man; we never get to vote on what he is to do." – Will Rogers

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